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Flowers, A Gift of Love or Guilt

Sometimes men overdo the gift of flowers or give them at the wrong time. Marketing and TV shows tell them that this is what women want. They are also told the gifting of flowers will gain them instant forgiveness and fix any wrongs that have occurred. They have been led to believe flowers are the winning formula for making up after ugly fights and damaging words. This, however, is not the truth. Yes, many women love flowers, as they are delicate like we are, but when they arrive constantly after a fight and there is no change in future behaviour, they lose their healing balm and only become an agitation. If flowers arrive mysteriously followed by a guilty look on a man’s face, then there will be more questions surrounding the gift. However, beautiful spontaneous flowers can really create a new connection of loving, especially if the man has added his own words in a card, revealing he has made an extra deep thinking effort—not just a grab and run fix.  I cannot stress enough how much women actually revel in the idea her man has stopped pursuing  his needs and interests long enough to take the time and purchase a card and actually write some deep feeling or even funny words in it. They will soak  up all those words you hand wrote cherishing each word, filled with the idea that she is important enough in the male mind for him to stop and take time to think about her. They do not bin the cards after reading like men do. Women are forgiving and lenient, so even a grab and run can have a positive effect.

Flowers in Relationships

What Flowers CAN”T do But Men CAN 

“Sadly, flowers can’t wash the dishes, vacuum the house, do the ironing or clean the oven, bathroom or toilet. They can’t make the lunches, feed the pets, make and serve dinner, replenish the beer or cup of tea, clean the sheets, chase perpetual washing all over the house, fold the clothes, pack the clothes away and do the shopping. They can’t be called on to be a taxi for all the family, speak to schoolteachers, help with homework and tutoring, give a massage, give one hour of free time for a women to emotionally prepare for sex, take a screaming baby for a walk or drive, care for ageing parents or wake up through the night soothing a stressed child.

Gifting flowers can bring a smile to the face and warmth to the heart, encouraging a woman to keep going. However with a generous, thoughtful helping hand to lighten your partner’s workload, an alternative path to better relations and less resentment might appear. This is one of the female formulas to increase potential intimacy.”  Subject matter covered in, my book  The Secrets Out! Men and Sex, Why Women Say No

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